First post of the year y'all!
So I just got to school on Saturday and classes start tomorrow. Fi helped me move in and comforted me whilst I cried like a lil baby (again thank you for coming with me, you are very great.) I really like my room and my roommate, we ate breakfast together this morning and I told her my anxieties about being back at school and how I don't have a lot of people here who I'm close to, etc etc., and we talked about movies/music and such. She is a big Woody Allen fan which pleasantly surprised me and she thinks critically about all sorts of music/is open to new artists and styles of music (she's a music major and plays the cello.) I decided I'm only going to take three classes this semester instead of four because I feel that it would reduce my stress and maybe help me to enjoy my classes more (but mainly because I was dropped off the waitlist for Geology lulz.) But even though things seem (and are) better than last year, I still feel that this isn't the right school for me. I don't know if it's because I have too many unsavory memories from last year or if it really is the people or the campus or Tacoma itself, but I'm pretty sure that I can't thrive here and can't live up to my full potential (ugh corny.) I called my dad yesterday and he was like, "well, if you're that sure then you might as well pack up your stuff and come home today so that you can apply to PSU in time for the fall quarter." And I was like "okay I will I just want to wait a couple days so I can talk to my advisor about details and legalities and such." But in my head I was like "well shit what a waste of time coming all the way out here and moving in and am I being too hasty about all of this?" SO I thought about it some more and spoke with my dad again today and we decided that it would be best if I stuck it out for this first semester and then applied somewhere else for spring semester. That way I can have more credits to transfer over, and hopefully will allow me to avoid core requirements at a new college. Also, if I get good grades this semester, which I'm going to try very hard to do, I could transfer somewhere like Lewis & Clark rather than PSU. Not that PSU isn't a perfectly good school, I just think I would maybe like it better at Lewis & Clark. So that's that. In a way I feel guilty because I know that I'm fortunate to be going here, so it's ungrateful of me not to enjoy it, but as my dad said to me on the phone, there's no point in spending so much money just to be unhappy for three more years. So I'm still not entirely sure what my plans are exactly, but I feel pretty good about my decision to transfer. I'm still gonna have a show so I'll let you guys know soon when my slot's gonna be. It's gonna be called Pony Club. Yeuh. I already miss all of you very much and I can't wait to hear how your semesters are going.
Love always & always,
Elaina
Monday, September 2, 2013
Sunday, May 12, 2013
ShortCheckinExamRevisionAH
Hello Friendships.
This won't be long because I really should get back to revising... But Nay that sounds like so fun and that guy sounds like a cuteay. I am getting more and more homesick by the hour. Like actually I was taking a break to walk on the beach one morning and these horses galloped by and I legitimately felt like crying. I might have shed like a little tear. Becca and I have developed the habit of reading aloud to each other during our breaks and we've gotten through a whole book already and are on our second one. Me and Victor started writing our first song for our band The Fairy Gnomes. I made us a cover:
The weather is being kind of Scottish and swinging from lovely and sunny and warm and hot and cloudy and miserable within a nanosecond. But for now at least I'm holed up in my dorm trying to force myself into remembering dates and players in the 12th century. My first exam is on Tuesday. And then by Saturday I'm done with first year forever and forever. It feels really strange - this thing that we've been prepping for our whole lives just boom a quarter done before I even realized. Too fast too fast too fast. And yet at this point as I'm sitting at my desk drowning in papers and lecture notes and motivational sticky notes, not fast enough. Keep going soph. I'll see you guys very soon
yours forever
Sophia
(ps sorry)
This won't be long because I really should get back to revising... But Nay that sounds like so fun and that guy sounds like a cuteay. I am getting more and more homesick by the hour. Like actually I was taking a break to walk on the beach one morning and these horses galloped by and I legitimately felt like crying. I might have shed like a little tear. Becca and I have developed the habit of reading aloud to each other during our breaks and we've gotten through a whole book already and are on our second one. Me and Victor started writing our first song for our band The Fairy Gnomes. I made us a cover:
The weather is being kind of Scottish and swinging from lovely and sunny and warm and hot and cloudy and miserable within a nanosecond. But for now at least I'm holed up in my dorm trying to force myself into remembering dates and players in the 12th century. My first exam is on Tuesday. And then by Saturday I'm done with first year forever and forever. It feels really strange - this thing that we've been prepping for our whole lives just boom a quarter done before I even realized. Too fast too fast too fast. And yet at this point as I'm sitting at my desk drowning in papers and lecture notes and motivational sticky notes, not fast enough. Keep going soph. I'll see you guys very soon
yours forever
Sophia
(ps sorry)
Friday, May 10, 2013
VANTAGE / THE END
SO i will start this probably overly-detailed account with the KUPS award barbecue last Friday. I didn't even want to go in the first place because I thought I would feel uncomfortable and awkward, etc. But at the last listening party, which was two days before the barbecue, I told Daniel that I would go. It was supposed to start at 3:00 but radio events are always behind schedule so I showed up at like 4:30. And right when I walked in the house, Daniel was in the kitchen and he was already kind of drunk (he has the tolerance of a bumble bee it is adorable) and told me to go to the back of the house where the barbecuing was happening. And right when I went onto the deck, people were being so nice to me! Kirby was grilling and he gave me a hamburger patty and I took a beer from the cooler and sat on the grass (alone lol) to eat my hamburger. I was perfectly content quietly observing people but I only sat by myself for like five minutes because this girl Kim Clancy (who I recognized because she's the Business Director for the radio but I had never talked to before) came up to me and said she liked my skirt. She sat down next to me and was being so friendly and I ended up hanging out with her for most of the barbecue. Then as we were talking, Ben Block came up to us and asked Kim when the awards were going to start and she said she had no idea and then he just stayed and talked with us. Kim was drinking hard cider because she collects it (wut so cool) and she even has a cider blog! (Later that night Ben and I decided to one day become cider farmers because we were so inspired by Kim's blog...) We went inside to the living room so Ben could take pictures of her holding her cider by the fireplace. We stayed inside until the awards started, and it was so nice. We talked about music and school and different cities and I felt really comfortable with both of them. Then Daniel came in to tell us the awards were starting so we went outside but the two of them went up to a big group of their friends so I went and sat next to this girl Chloe, who had her show before mine last semester. And then I won my award and got a little too exited about it and managed to get extremely cross-faded by like 7:45...so yeah. I went back to my room and was planning on just calling it a night, but Kim texted me and was like "where did u go....there's an after party at nick's" So (after calling Hailey and Kelsey...lolol) I took a short nap and sobered up a little and decided to go to the after party. And when I got there, I just continued my conversation with Ben and he and I talked for basically the whole time! So that was nice, then I went home and went to sleep.
Then, I didn't talk to them for the rest of the week, but on Wednesday, Kim texted me asking if I needed a ride to Vantage which is the party I went to yesterday. I wasn't planning on going but I said yes because YOLO and also I didn't have any other plans. So we left yesterday at around 1 and got there around 3:30. The car ride was nice because people sort of kept to themselves/listened to their respective iPods. When we got there, though, the party had already started and people were already really drunk. I only had one drink (yay me!) because I didn't want to come back today with a hangover cause I have a meeting later with my humanities professor. So I was basically one of very few sober people there but that kind of made it more fun in a way. Ben, who rode up with us, hung out with me for most of the time!! He's so cute! I love him! I want him 2 b mine 4 ever!!! And he wasn't that drunk either which was so cool you guys because it was the first time I ever kissed someone without being under the influence of anything woooo! So all we did was kiss but it felt really natural and fun and we didn't even kiss for that long, mainly we just talked. At one point we were looking through our notes on our phones and I found one on mine that said "Eat Capt'n Crunch more often Mulan Rugrats" and he was like "hmmm maybe it was a band name that you were trying to remember." And I was like what no who would name their band that? So yup. Kim's friend brought a tent but they were too drunk to assemble it and I wasn't trynna put it together on my own so we slept on the ground which was fine because it was warm. We got back around quarter to 12 today which was good because I will still have time to do work today (we are on reading period). So yes! I'm happy I decided to go. Even though they're older than me and they won't be here when I'm a senior, I feel like I have a little group of friends (well basically just Kim and Ben) that I feel myself with. So I think the plan, for now, is to stay at UPS and see how things go. Ha of course these good things are happening when I only have a few days left in my Freshman year... lol @ my life. (wow I am so sorry) I am still very tired so ~and I know we always apologize for this at the ends of our posts, but...~ sorry if this is wordy and rambly. I can't believe I will be home in 5 days. I can't wait to see you all in the same place and hear your stories and watch movies together and behave in ways that are not considered socially acceptable.
Love love love Elaina
Then, I didn't talk to them for the rest of the week, but on Wednesday, Kim texted me asking if I needed a ride to Vantage which is the party I went to yesterday. I wasn't planning on going but I said yes because YOLO and also I didn't have any other plans. So we left yesterday at around 1 and got there around 3:30. The car ride was nice because people sort of kept to themselves/listened to their respective iPods. When we got there, though, the party had already started and people were already really drunk. I only had one drink (yay me!) because I didn't want to come back today with a hangover cause I have a meeting later with my humanities professor. So I was basically one of very few sober people there but that kind of made it more fun in a way. Ben, who rode up with us, hung out with me for most of the time!! He's so cute! I love him! I want him 2 b mine 4 ever!!! And he wasn't that drunk either which was so cool you guys because it was the first time I ever kissed someone without being under the influence of anything woooo! So all we did was kiss but it felt really natural and fun and we didn't even kiss for that long, mainly we just talked. At one point we were looking through our notes on our phones and I found one on mine that said "Eat Capt'n Crunch more often Mulan Rugrats" and he was like "hmmm maybe it was a band name that you were trying to remember." And I was like what no who would name their band that? So yup. Kim's friend brought a tent but they were too drunk to assemble it and I wasn't trynna put it together on my own so we slept on the ground which was fine because it was warm. We got back around quarter to 12 today which was good because I will still have time to do work today (we are on reading period). So yes! I'm happy I decided to go. Even though they're older than me and they won't be here when I'm a senior, I feel like I have a little group of friends (well basically just Kim and Ben) that I feel myself with. So I think the plan, for now, is to stay at UPS and see how things go. Ha of course these good things are happening when I only have a few days left in my Freshman year... lol @ my life. (wow I am so sorry) I am still very tired so ~and I know we always apologize for this at the ends of our posts, but...~ sorry if this is wordy and rambly. I can't believe I will be home in 5 days. I can't wait to see you all in the same place and hear your stories and watch movies together and behave in ways that are not considered socially acceptable.
Love love love Elaina
Saturday, April 6, 2013
New
Lately--mainly after I've come back to school from spring break--things have been very different for me. I've realized that my problem with this school isn't the fact that I am socially inept or socially awkward or anything like that, but rather the fact that I simply don't enjoy being around the people here because they don't offer me anything new or refreshing. I was very bitter about it for a long time because I thought that there might be something wrong with me, because everyone who went here seemed to be in love with this school. But now I'm not so upset about it because I've realized that the problem isn't my fault. I made a mistake in coming to this school, but I'm glad that I did because it's helped me to figure out what I think would make me happier, which is to be surrounded by new culture and compassionate people. As I've been discovering this, things have been a little better in way, because I've stopped caring about what the people here think of me. I wear what I want, I don't feel self-conscious if my hair is greasy, I've stopped bothering to wear makeup and most importantly I've stopped being so polite to everyone here because some people just don't appreciate or deserve it. I'm not saying that every student who goes here is mean or a bad person or anything like that, but for the most part, the best way that I can describe the student body is a group of high schoolers who are trying to pretend like they're in college by being accepting and open, when really they're still too used to the segregated cliques and unwritten social customs of high school that they don't even realize how they haven't changed or evolved.
So basically I have no idea what I am going to do next fall...I might go here for the first semester and then transfer to a new school for the spring semester, or I might go to PSU in the fall and then transfer to a different school, or I might take a gap year or a gap semester...I just don't know right now, but I'm trying not to stress about it. And SPEAKING of stress, I don't know if you guys listened to my show today, but I talked about something called Transcendental Meditation which is this amazing thing that I've been researching a little bit over the past couple days. I learned about it when I was watching this movie called "Man on the Moon" about Andy Kaufman (who I'm developing a big ol' fan girl crush on) because he was supposedly really devoted to it. It's incredible. It was developed in the 70's by yogi Ravi Shankar and it's used by a bunch of famous people like David Lynch (there's actually a video of him talking about it on dat youtube that's really interesting), Oprah Winfrey, The Beatles and I'm sure a bunch of other people. I'm going to be really bad at explaining it because it's really complicated and I don't even fully understand how it works, but basically it's a way to experience a state of pure consciousness, which is awesome because what it does is let's your mind find it's own natural path to happiness rather than being controlled. (I know that probably makes no sense but I'm really bad at explaining). Also, it supposedly raises your IQ because--and I think this is the coolest part--it allows the left and right sides of your brain to communicate with each other, and what that does is allows you to utilize a larger percent of your brain power. Cause you know how you only use like 10 or 15% or something of your brain? This let's you just use more of it, and this raises your IQ which is cool, but what's more amazing is that it allows you relate better to other people, and makes you more compassionate because using different parts of your brain helps you to rationalize situations. I know it might sound kind of ~fishy~ and/or ~drug induced~ but another cool thing about it is that it's recommended that you don't use drugs of any kind if you practice TM because it clouds your brain and makes it more difficult to achieve pure consciousness. Also, fun fact that my dad told me today, yoga is based off of TM! Anyway I think I really want to try it, maybe this summer if anyone wants to join me...you take four consecutive classes (you're supposed to be able to master it in four days) and then after that you're supposed to meditate twice a day. I'll post some links at the end of this so you know I'm not making it all up...heh. I feel like I'm coercing you guys to join a cult. MEDITATE WITH ME OR DIE.
Another lil' thang I've been majorly into as of late is Gogol Bordello. I've always liked their music but I recently watched a documentary about them called "Non-Stop" and it fucking blew my mind. It was amazing and the lead singer, Eugene Hutz, is probably one of the most incredible people/musicians ever. So. If you wanna get down on some gypsy punk, listen to them. I think all of you have Start Wearing Purple but you should look up Through the Roof 'n Underground and Alcohol and Immigrant Punk. Those are my favorites. And that concludes this long-ass post.
Sophia, apologies for basically repeating everything from my letter on here! I am excited to get yours. As always, I miss you and love you all very very much. Here's a link of Yogi Maharishi Mahesh talkin' bout TM. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zc-A49r2F0w Here's another video of a very peculiar man also talking about it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjT831cjaUY and here's David Lynch talking about it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvB-faw1WvY
Love Elaina
So basically I have no idea what I am going to do next fall...I might go here for the first semester and then transfer to a new school for the spring semester, or I might go to PSU in the fall and then transfer to a different school, or I might take a gap year or a gap semester...I just don't know right now, but I'm trying not to stress about it. And SPEAKING of stress, I don't know if you guys listened to my show today, but I talked about something called Transcendental Meditation which is this amazing thing that I've been researching a little bit over the past couple days. I learned about it when I was watching this movie called "Man on the Moon" about Andy Kaufman (who I'm developing a big ol' fan girl crush on) because he was supposedly really devoted to it. It's incredible. It was developed in the 70's by yogi Ravi Shankar and it's used by a bunch of famous people like David Lynch (there's actually a video of him talking about it on dat youtube that's really interesting), Oprah Winfrey, The Beatles and I'm sure a bunch of other people. I'm going to be really bad at explaining it because it's really complicated and I don't even fully understand how it works, but basically it's a way to experience a state of pure consciousness, which is awesome because what it does is let's your mind find it's own natural path to happiness rather than being controlled. (I know that probably makes no sense but I'm really bad at explaining). Also, it supposedly raises your IQ because--and I think this is the coolest part--it allows the left and right sides of your brain to communicate with each other, and what that does is allows you to utilize a larger percent of your brain power. Cause you know how you only use like 10 or 15% or something of your brain? This let's you just use more of it, and this raises your IQ which is cool, but what's more amazing is that it allows you relate better to other people, and makes you more compassionate because using different parts of your brain helps you to rationalize situations. I know it might sound kind of ~fishy~ and/or ~drug induced~ but another cool thing about it is that it's recommended that you don't use drugs of any kind if you practice TM because it clouds your brain and makes it more difficult to achieve pure consciousness. Also, fun fact that my dad told me today, yoga is based off of TM! Anyway I think I really want to try it, maybe this summer if anyone wants to join me...you take four consecutive classes (you're supposed to be able to master it in four days) and then after that you're supposed to meditate twice a day. I'll post some links at the end of this so you know I'm not making it all up...heh. I feel like I'm coercing you guys to join a cult. MEDITATE WITH ME OR DIE.
Another lil' thang I've been majorly into as of late is Gogol Bordello. I've always liked their music but I recently watched a documentary about them called "Non-Stop" and it fucking blew my mind. It was amazing and the lead singer, Eugene Hutz, is probably one of the most incredible people/musicians ever. So. If you wanna get down on some gypsy punk, listen to them. I think all of you have Start Wearing Purple but you should look up Through the Roof 'n Underground and Alcohol and Immigrant Punk. Those are my favorites. And that concludes this long-ass post.
Sophia, apologies for basically repeating everything from my letter on here! I am excited to get yours. As always, I miss you and love you all very very much. Here's a link of Yogi Maharishi Mahesh talkin' bout TM. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zc-A49r2F0w Here's another video of a very peculiar man also talking about it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjT831cjaUY and here's David Lynch talking about it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvB-faw1WvY
Love Elaina
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
pissy
I don't know why I'm in such a fucking bad mood right now but I just feel like screaming and crying and ranting so that is what I am going to do. I guess the first reason isn't really even that big of a deal at all it was just super annoying. So we're figuring out and deciding where we are living next year and who we want to room with and where and such and like a month ago I thought of a great plan of getting the one quad for me angi claire and kels. It was a great plan and if that didn't work out we'd just get two singles and be next to each other. I was really happy. Then Angi said that she was maybe going to apply for and interest section because she thinks she'll have a better chance at becoming an SA blabity bla blabla you guys don't care BUT then claire was all really shy all of a sudden one day and told me that she applied to live in Tamarc which is an outdoor interest dorm thing and i really didn't care it was fine she doesn't even think she'll get in because its so popular so I said she was always welcome to stay. So kels and I are planning stuff, possibly living with the other freshman from my basketball team Alyssa and some guys in a health and fitness interest section in one of the dorms and are getting everything planned out and kelsey keeps like avoiding and postponing and not planning and then she randomly walks in my room is like-- well Bri and Rachel (girls from her soccer team) asked me to live with them too so I have to figure it out. And I was like okay whatever do it today because we have to turn our form in and she didn't say anything to me all day and finally that night I texted her cause alyssa was over and we were planning and she took awhile to respond and then just said - okay so I think I'm going to live with bri and rachel just because they're both soccer players and it would be easier and I don't really know the basketball guys. I'm sorry.-- so I just like okay. whatever. I'll just room with alyssa next year (and now it may turn out being her me and 6 guys in a suite in one of the dorms) and then I was kind of like ranting to James about it cause he walked in the room when I was like greeeaaaatttt and he was like -- oh weird kelsey's only ever talked about living with them I hadn't heard the other plan. and that made me so pissed. WHY THE FUCK WOULDN'T SHE JUST COME TALK TO ME LIKE A NORMAL PERSON. hey so Rachel and Bri just invited me to live with them just so you know. Thats what Claire and Angi did. why is she unable to talk about any sort of thing that could cause the tiniest bit of conflict unless its over text. If she would have warned me I would not be pissy right now. So I haven't really talked to her or seen her in the last two days. I'm not mad just really annoyed. She needs to grow up. I had a really good talk with boyfriend tonight and it helped me a lot with understanding and it was lovely which made my night a lot better in the end even though it was shitty to begin with. Hope you all are well. love ya
Sunday, March 10, 2013
fucking big LIFE decisions, man
Man, what I really need right now is a night with my best friends running around the city like crazy people making strangers uncomfortable and then coming home and eating random food combinations while watching british period dramas and cracking stupid dirty jokes. I want a night of belly laughing and cuddling and long heart to heart talks.
Things have been really busy and wierd lately. By weird I mean some days are great - I'll be feeling really productive and happy grateful for the people and things in my life, and have fantastic rehearsals full of hard work and laughter and goodness - and then some days are just really shitty and I'll be wondering what the hell I'm doing with my life and where I'm going and I'll be so stressed and feel like all my relationships are all messy and just feel in general BLECHness. So it's been a weird roller-coaster of emotions in the past few weeks. I recently (as in just last week pretty much) got a new agency, I don't know if I told ya'll. It was kind of a spontaneous thing which I was opposed to at first, but I decided to give it another shot. They're really nice, normal people who treat me like a real person (whoa, crazy, like models have brains, personalities and feelings?)and they've already been sending me to a bunch of castings - I went to Seattle on friday for a casting for Nordstroms online store woooo! That was really nice cuz I got to spend a day in Seattle with my mom and we somehow got to talking all about her twenties and all the roadtrips she spontaneously took and all the crazy things she did. I reaaally wanted to stop in Tacoma and visit nay but we had to get straight there, go to the casting, and then take like two hours to eat lunch and see the city from the car window and then drive home in time for a concert that Miles got us tickets for. Oh and yesterday I found out I got accepted into Southern Oregon University! yay. So that's good. And Ablaze is going great. It's actually really really great. I'm so so grateful that its a part of my life, because I'm having a lot of fun with the cast, and the play, I think, is going to be good. We're all working our asses off so it better DAYUM be. Sooo these are all great things, but one of the things thats been stressing me out lately is that at the beginning of this week the agency sent me an email saying that they talked to the agencies I was with in Paris and New York and that they were "thrilled that I'm back in the biz and possibly would want me to come work with them again". SO, shit. Again i'm back at the crossroads of which direction to go...school next fall or try out the modeling thing again....I know I've said tons of times that I didn't want to continue with it because it was too stressful and superficial and blah blah...and I mean that won't change. But I've been thinking about it a lot, and this is something that would give me the opportunity to travel and have these experiences that I'd never be able to have later in life - I mean, its now or never. with college, I can go later if I want to. And, maybe I could make some money with it to pay off college loans...and, my parents have been really stressed out about money lately and I know they have no idea what they're going to do when they get older because they have no money for retirement or anything, so I kind of fantasize about making a lot of money and being able to take care of them like they've taken care of me. They keep saying thats not my responsibility, but I feel like it is - I feel like it would be selfish to not do anything - and I mean, I would benefit from it too. Well, possibly. Maybe I wouldn't actually be successful, there's no way to know for sure. but my main hesitation is that it was very stressful and scary, and if I did it again I would have to do it alone...I mean, it wasn't completely bad, it was fun and exciting sometimes too. The circumstances would be different now, since I'm older and have more experience....I do worry that I'd be changed by it, because it is so completely superficial and not intellectually stimulating whatsoever. I worry that I'd become depressed, because of that - I didn't really like a lot of the people and didn't really know who to trust - but then again, I was pretty young so it was all very overwhelming. I think I'd be able to handle myself a lot better this time and not let these things get to me. ...And sometimes I actually miss it. Not all the bad things I was just talking about, but I miss the cities and the excitement of it. So. GAH. I am very very conflicted. My original plan was to study theatre at SOU, but there's always that voice in the back of my mind saying that that's so impractical - like, what can I do with a theatre major? I don't want to teach theatre, and I don't think I'm good enough to make it big in the business...and modeling is something I know I can do.....
WHEW. wow, I just spewed a weeks worth of worries on you, sorry guys. I just really needed to get that out there. And I want you to know what going through my mind cuz I love you all and I would want to know all your shit too. So feel free to spew your shit all over me too!!!!! (GROSSSS) hahah don't ya miss me?
Anyways, I miss you so much. And I love you dearly. Thank you for bearing with me and my long derpy indecisive rants <3 <3 <3
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Story of Sophie's First Date Ever
Ok so this isn't a big deal but it actually completely is so yes. Please excuse any girly rambling and remember that I am a very level headed individual.
So that morning he calls me up and he's like are you free tonight do you want to go to drinks and so after my lecture I had a freak out that I don't own clothes and he is like the most immaculately dressed person ever and I was like Jeans and converse? and my friends were like NO SOPHIA NO so I went to h&m to find a new outfit. Then I had this huge debacle of how soon I should go out of the dorm where he was going to pick me up but then he just called me so it was okay and i just kind of bounded out of the door and down the stairs and sort of ran into him cause he was closer than I thought and I was like HI. Which I think made me come across as cool calm and collected which is good.
like i had a really good time. We got there and he was like what do you want to drink and I was like "I'll have a beer" (dainty soph) and then i was like, do you need money? and he just kind of laughs and was like no i'm good i got it. So then he just talked about his science and research and his 45 min interview he has to do in london next week for his PHD grant and this one interview were he walked in and they pushed a flower toward him and just gestured at it and was like 'so what do you think about this flower' and I talked about Virginia Woolf and stories and you guys and disney land and more zombies.
And like at one point one of his friends turned up and like ran over to our table and was like WHO'S YOUR LOVER and i was THANK GOD intoxicated enough not to blush and I just stuck out my hand Yeah, name's Sophia pleased to meet you. And he was like Oh my gosh is this that girl!? (yyeeeeahhh) and then when he left I was like, He seems nice and Patrick was like he's a model and I was like MY BEST FRIEND'S A MODEL. And he was like, I've always found models to be less beautiful in real life. And I'm like, she's the most beautiful person I know. Then he's like, I hope I'm like a close second and I'm all OH indubitably. Lol. I never thought i'd use that word in a conversation i'm such a dork.
And we've decided that next time (more importantly that there is a next time) we're going to go see a show aaand then have a movie marathon of this show he introduced to me.
I mean, in the end since I hadn't had that much to eat I was SLIGHTLY more intoxicated than two beers should have gotten me but whatayagannado.
like...yeap. What else d'yall wanna know? it was just really funny and nice and easy. I really like Patrick.
and OUT.
So that morning he calls me up and he's like are you free tonight do you want to go to drinks and so after my lecture I had a freak out that I don't own clothes and he is like the most immaculately dressed person ever and I was like Jeans and converse? and my friends were like NO SOPHIA NO so I went to h&m to find a new outfit. Then I had this huge debacle of how soon I should go out of the dorm where he was going to pick me up but then he just called me so it was okay and i just kind of bounded out of the door and down the stairs and sort of ran into him cause he was closer than I thought and I was like HI. Which I think made me come across as cool calm and collected which is good.
like i had a really good time. We got there and he was like what do you want to drink and I was like "I'll have a beer" (dainty soph) and then i was like, do you need money? and he just kind of laughs and was like no i'm good i got it. So then he just talked about his science and research and his 45 min interview he has to do in london next week for his PHD grant and this one interview were he walked in and they pushed a flower toward him and just gestured at it and was like 'so what do you think about this flower' and I talked about Virginia Woolf and stories and you guys and disney land and more zombies.
And like at one point one of his friends turned up and like ran over to our table and was like WHO'S YOUR LOVER and i was THANK GOD intoxicated enough not to blush and I just stuck out my hand Yeah, name's Sophia pleased to meet you. And he was like Oh my gosh is this that girl!? (yyeeeeahhh) and then when he left I was like, He seems nice and Patrick was like he's a model and I was like MY BEST FRIEND'S A MODEL. And he was like, I've always found models to be less beautiful in real life. And I'm like, she's the most beautiful person I know. Then he's like, I hope I'm like a close second and I'm all OH indubitably. Lol. I never thought i'd use that word in a conversation i'm such a dork.
And we've decided that next time (more importantly that there is a next time) we're going to go see a show aaand then have a movie marathon of this show he introduced to me.
I mean, in the end since I hadn't had that much to eat I was SLIGHTLY more intoxicated than two beers should have gotten me but whatayagannado.
like...yeap. What else d'yall wanna know? it was just really funny and nice and easy. I really like Patrick.
and OUT.
Monday, February 25, 2013
lately
In my humanities class today this girl who sits next to me was handing out cookies for some reason, and when she tried to hand me one I just blurted out "Oh no thanks, I'm allergic to Gluten! Thanks anyway." Which I most definitely am not, so I'm still not quite sure why my brain felt the need to tell my mouth to say that. I would have loved to have eaten that cookie!
This weekend my mom came to visit me and Sam for our belated birthday and it was really nice. She stayed at the Silver Cloud Inn and I spent the night there with her on Saturday. We didn't really do anything, we just sort of kicked it in the hotel room for most of her visit. She got here on Saturday at around noon and we went to lunch at a Thai place called Wild Orchid and I had this really delicious ginger chicken thing that came with this delectable fried rice that tasted like it was harvested in the wheat fields of the LORD. After lunch we went back to my room (oh yeah, my roommate is moving out, I don't know if I told you...literally she just left without saying anything at all what a biiiiiiitchhhhh) and I showed her my new wall decorations and stuff and then we got Sam from his dorm and went back to the hotel where we opened our presentzz. I got a record player (as you know), The Colossus by Sylvia Plath, an antique prescription bottle from like the 20's and a pair of penny loafers, which I am wearing today and I love them except they are a little uncomfortable. On Saturday night, we got room service for dinner and I ordered a chicken sandwich and a chocolate milkshake and Sam ate with us and then went back to school because he was going to a Sigma Chi Partay. So me and my mom stayed up super late watching netflix and she brought with her this movie called Control, which I highly highly highly recommend. It's about Ian Curtis from Joy Division, and it was just wonderful. Then we watched Downton Abbey forEVER and then it was like 2 a.m. but we weren't really tired so we just sort of hung out and I played my guitar. Then we went to sleep and I slept horribly and kept getting really overheated and then really really cold and I felt like I was on crack. The next morning we ate breakfast in the lobby of the hotel and then went to Nordstrom with Sam to get him some shoes, and then my mom left at like 3.
When I went back to my room I was unpacking my overnight bag and everything was fine and then all of a sudden as I was making my bed, I just kind of broke down and started crying for no reason. And I cried and screamed into my pillow for such a long time, and today I have these little red dots all around my eyes from broken blood vessels and I just have no clue why I got so upset. Today I feel completely fine, so I am just really confused why that happened.
Anyway, I should go because I have to analyze the Communist Manifesto for politics class. HOORAY. Love and miss you all like cray.
~Elaina
This weekend my mom came to visit me and Sam for our belated birthday and it was really nice. She stayed at the Silver Cloud Inn and I spent the night there with her on Saturday. We didn't really do anything, we just sort of kicked it in the hotel room for most of her visit. She got here on Saturday at around noon and we went to lunch at a Thai place called Wild Orchid and I had this really delicious ginger chicken thing that came with this delectable fried rice that tasted like it was harvested in the wheat fields of the LORD. After lunch we went back to my room (oh yeah, my roommate is moving out, I don't know if I told you...literally she just left without saying anything at all what a biiiiiiitchhhhh) and I showed her my new wall decorations and stuff and then we got Sam from his dorm and went back to the hotel where we opened our presentzz. I got a record player (as you know), The Colossus by Sylvia Plath, an antique prescription bottle from like the 20's and a pair of penny loafers, which I am wearing today and I love them except they are a little uncomfortable. On Saturday night, we got room service for dinner and I ordered a chicken sandwich and a chocolate milkshake and Sam ate with us and then went back to school because he was going to a Sigma Chi Partay. So me and my mom stayed up super late watching netflix and she brought with her this movie called Control, which I highly highly highly recommend. It's about Ian Curtis from Joy Division, and it was just wonderful. Then we watched Downton Abbey forEVER and then it was like 2 a.m. but we weren't really tired so we just sort of hung out and I played my guitar. Then we went to sleep and I slept horribly and kept getting really overheated and then really really cold and I felt like I was on crack. The next morning we ate breakfast in the lobby of the hotel and then went to Nordstrom with Sam to get him some shoes, and then my mom left at like 3.
When I went back to my room I was unpacking my overnight bag and everything was fine and then all of a sudden as I was making my bed, I just kind of broke down and started crying for no reason. And I cried and screamed into my pillow for such a long time, and today I have these little red dots all around my eyes from broken blood vessels and I just have no clue why I got so upset. Today I feel completely fine, so I am just really confused why that happened.
Anyway, I should go because I have to analyze the Communist Manifesto for politics class. HOORAY. Love and miss you all like cray.
~Elaina
Friday, February 15, 2013
Problem (I can hear the bells) and THE BEST
Guys I legitimately think I have a problem. I have legitimately been looking at wedding stuff way too much lately. That stupid site pinterest got me started on it. Now I have like my entire wedding planned out and I know what my dress is going to look like and to make matters worse I've also only watched say yes to the dress the last two days in the hotel. I need to find a new hobby but don't really want to because its pretty fun. Anyway I hope you all had a fantastic valentines day. and thank you all for the birthday wishes. It was kind of ridiculous. I literally had the best weekend- my favorite thus far of my time at whitman.
It started Thursday just really not having much to do and then Friday was great. We had a game that night that we won in overtime by three and it was so stressful and exciting and awesome AND because we had had four games in eight days we had both saturday and sunday off from basketball sooooo I partied and drank even though we're "technically" not supposed to because of dry season (pretty much everyone on my team who drinks went out) so I came back and just chilled for a bit and then I got ready and dressed all country-y for this hick party at one of the frats (TKE- pronouced "teak") and I went to that for a bit and danced with only Angi- you see because we were being lesbians for the night so she wouldn't go home with anyone- then I ran around for a bit trying to find girls on my basketball team. I actually ended up talking to a girl Hallie who's on my team and got to know her a little better which was really fun shes super cool and I think we'll be pretty good friends. We were trying to gather all in one place but it didn't really work out so I ended up going over the Beta and playing some beer pong with him and dancing and then leaving and hanging out in his room til like 2 and then going to sleep.
The next day I woke up at like 9 stayed awake til 9:40 and then went back to sleep and slept til 12:30. I went to brunch with mah boizz at the dining hall and for the rest of the day I literally don't really know what I did. I painted my nails for the night because I was going to a Mardi Gras themed party at Beta and picked out my outfit and literally waited around for like 3 hours doing nothing while my nails dried. AND THEY DIDN'T EVEN DRY ALL THE WAY BECAUSE OF THE GLITTER I STILL FUCKED THEM UP SOMEHOW. Anyway, I went out to dinner at this yummy burger place and when we got back I reallllllyyyy got ready to go out. I looked haught hawt haut too. I went to Hallie's room in a different dorm with Alyssa (the other freshman on the basketball team) and had a beer then Hallie and some of her friends and I went to Beta and I literally had the best night. I danced so much and played pong and drank yummy dranks and danced and sang to all types of music and sometime after midnight they made this huge bonfire in the backyard and we all just stood around it and talked and laughed and drank and it was so fun. We didn't get back to my room til like 2:40 but that was completely fine.
The next morning I made the rounds to wake everyone up at 10 because we were getting brunch at 11 for my birthday! They were all supposed to come and then I was surprised by FIONA WOODMAN there. It wasn't completely a surprise because I'm not that oblivious but it was still great. She came back to my room and we just visited and laughed and were loud and weird and she met my friends and compared music with Sam and all the boiz were like HOTDAMNSHESATTRACTIVE and I was like IKNOW and then we went on like a three hour walk around campus and town and went to goodwill and bought things and then later we went and watched the sunset in the wheat fields with some people and it was beautiful and spectacular and then we went to dinner at one of my favorite places called Olive and it was delicious and so girly and fun. We talked about sex a lot more than probably socially acceptable. but whatevs.... YOLO amiright? we spent the rest of the night just being really weird (normal for us) and loud and talking and giggling and laughing hysterically and I did a lil homework. At midnight I got a present and some cards for my birthday which was nice and fun and then we stayed up until 4 talking in the guys section lounge and it was great. She slept in my bed and we fit great together there (she fits with me on my twin bed quite nicely =])
The next day I had class at 10 and 11 and then met Fi for lunch at our main like student center thing where we ate chicken. Then I had class at 1 til 2:20 but she stayed and hung out with Kels and others. She left around 3 and it was sad but so fun when she was here. I'm so glad you came and saw my life at whitman Fi that was so cool and the best birthday present.
anyway afterwards everyone knew about it and had been playing birthday sex outside the door at one point which was funny but awkward when I walked back into my room and there were like 7 people just in there and it was just extraordinarily awkward and funny cause I was all flushed and my hair was a mess (actually cause I had just taken it down from a bun but none of them knew that) Anyway.... like right after that I had to go to basketball practice and all I wanted to do was sleep. it was a nice and short practice with a light lift at the end luckily because afterwards I ran back to anderson to shower and get ready for my birthday dinner that boyfriend took me to. We went to probably the nicest place in Walla Walla called Whitehouse Crawford and its in this beautiful old building that used to be the lumberyard when Walla Walla was a logging town and the restaurant was so yummy and beautiful and I had a great time and got to dress up all fancy. The only problem was I was so sleepy from my so many good days in a row that I was really out of it at dinner and kinda spacey and falling asleep so I felt really bad. when we got back to anderson, Angi had made me a cake and they sang to me and we ate it- I didn't I was so full from dinner (lamb ragu) and did just relaxed for the rest of my birthday. It was so great.
The two days after it I felt kinda sick and perpetually sick but I guess thats what you get when you have four great days in a row. Best birthday weekend ever. I'm so happy with my life right now. I'm in love with my boyfriend I have great friends and live in a beautiful place. Thank you guys for being a part of that and being so supportive and loving. Its really pretty awesome and cool. I love you. Hope you liked my story!
Love Hailey
It started Thursday just really not having much to do and then Friday was great. We had a game that night that we won in overtime by three and it was so stressful and exciting and awesome AND because we had had four games in eight days we had both saturday and sunday off from basketball sooooo I partied and drank even though we're "technically" not supposed to because of dry season (pretty much everyone on my team who drinks went out) so I came back and just chilled for a bit and then I got ready and dressed all country-y for this hick party at one of the frats (TKE- pronouced "teak") and I went to that for a bit and danced with only Angi- you see because we were being lesbians for the night so she wouldn't go home with anyone- then I ran around for a bit trying to find girls on my basketball team. I actually ended up talking to a girl Hallie who's on my team and got to know her a little better which was really fun shes super cool and I think we'll be pretty good friends. We were trying to gather all in one place but it didn't really work out so I ended up going over the Beta and playing some beer pong with him and dancing and then leaving and hanging out in his room til like 2 and then going to sleep.
The next day I woke up at like 9 stayed awake til 9:40 and then went back to sleep and slept til 12:30. I went to brunch with mah boizz at the dining hall and for the rest of the day I literally don't really know what I did. I painted my nails for the night because I was going to a Mardi Gras themed party at Beta and picked out my outfit and literally waited around for like 3 hours doing nothing while my nails dried. AND THEY DIDN'T EVEN DRY ALL THE WAY BECAUSE OF THE GLITTER I STILL FUCKED THEM UP SOMEHOW. Anyway, I went out to dinner at this yummy burger place and when we got back I reallllllyyyy got ready to go out. I looked haught hawt haut too. I went to Hallie's room in a different dorm with Alyssa (the other freshman on the basketball team) and had a beer then Hallie and some of her friends and I went to Beta and I literally had the best night. I danced so much and played pong and drank yummy dranks and danced and sang to all types of music and sometime after midnight they made this huge bonfire in the backyard and we all just stood around it and talked and laughed and drank and it was so fun. We didn't get back to my room til like 2:40 but that was completely fine.
The next morning I made the rounds to wake everyone up at 10 because we were getting brunch at 11 for my birthday! They were all supposed to come and then I was surprised by FIONA WOODMAN there. It wasn't completely a surprise because I'm not that oblivious but it was still great. She came back to my room and we just visited and laughed and were loud and weird and she met my friends and compared music with Sam and all the boiz were like HOTDAMNSHESATTRACTIVE and I was like IKNOW and then we went on like a three hour walk around campus and town and went to goodwill and bought things and then later we went and watched the sunset in the wheat fields with some people and it was beautiful and spectacular and then we went to dinner at one of my favorite places called Olive and it was delicious and so girly and fun. We talked about sex a lot more than probably socially acceptable. but whatevs.... YOLO amiright? we spent the rest of the night just being really weird (normal for us) and loud and talking and giggling and laughing hysterically and I did a lil homework. At midnight I got a present and some cards for my birthday which was nice and fun and then we stayed up until 4 talking in the guys section lounge and it was great. She slept in my bed and we fit great together there (she fits with me on my twin bed quite nicely =])
The next day I had class at 10 and 11 and then met Fi for lunch at our main like student center thing where we ate chicken. Then I had class at 1 til 2:20 but she stayed and hung out with Kels and others. She left around 3 and it was sad but so fun when she was here. I'm so glad you came and saw my life at whitman Fi that was so cool and the best birthday present.
anyway afterwards everyone knew about it and had been playing birthday sex outside the door at one point which was funny but awkward when I walked back into my room and there were like 7 people just in there and it was just extraordinarily awkward and funny cause I was all flushed and my hair was a mess (actually cause I had just taken it down from a bun but none of them knew that) Anyway.... like right after that I had to go to basketball practice and all I wanted to do was sleep. it was a nice and short practice with a light lift at the end luckily because afterwards I ran back to anderson to shower and get ready for my birthday dinner that boyfriend took me to. We went to probably the nicest place in Walla Walla called Whitehouse Crawford and its in this beautiful old building that used to be the lumberyard when Walla Walla was a logging town and the restaurant was so yummy and beautiful and I had a great time and got to dress up all fancy. The only problem was I was so sleepy from my so many good days in a row that I was really out of it at dinner and kinda spacey and falling asleep so I felt really bad. when we got back to anderson, Angi had made me a cake and they sang to me and we ate it- I didn't I was so full from dinner (lamb ragu) and did just relaxed for the rest of my birthday. It was so great.
The two days after it I felt kinda sick and perpetually sick but I guess thats what you get when you have four great days in a row. Best birthday weekend ever. I'm so happy with my life right now. I'm in love with my boyfriend I have great friends and live in a beautiful place. Thank you guys for being a part of that and being so supportive and loving. Its really pretty awesome and cool. I love you. Hope you liked my story!
Love Hailey
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
moments before a lecture
My dearest Elaina you will never fully understand my deep respect for your ability to explore the actual and literal corners of the inter-web. It can hardly be called procrastination when it is just so impressive and unique.
I am currently sitting in my Art History lecture theatre. Not very exciting - it hasn't even started yet. People are trickling in and this one girl keeps coughing and it's making me cringe - I hate the sounds that people make - it's making me feel like I'm breathing in germs and there's no way for me to stop it. Ugh.
After this I'm going to go and read all my primary sources I need for Medieval history, which I actually really enjoy. Surprisingly English is my least favorite subject right now - Gulliver's Travels isn't really my cup of tea and finishing a book a week isn't my style of reading unless I actually enjoy the novel.
I'm having a meeting with my tutor tomorrow to talk about my essay - but I haven't even started doing anything other than checking out a bunch of books on the subject. They are sitting comfortably, and unopened, on my desk. That counts as starting right?
It's snowing up here. I really dislike snow. I like snow when I'm safely inside with hot chocolate - which is how I plan on spending my afternoon in the Medieval Library.
A girl just fell off her chair and we all pretended it didn't happen. The lecture is about to start.
So Bye.
I am currently sitting in my Art History lecture theatre. Not very exciting - it hasn't even started yet. People are trickling in and this one girl keeps coughing and it's making me cringe - I hate the sounds that people make - it's making me feel like I'm breathing in germs and there's no way for me to stop it. Ugh.
After this I'm going to go and read all my primary sources I need for Medieval history, which I actually really enjoy. Surprisingly English is my least favorite subject right now - Gulliver's Travels isn't really my cup of tea and finishing a book a week isn't my style of reading unless I actually enjoy the novel.
I'm having a meeting with my tutor tomorrow to talk about my essay - but I haven't even started doing anything other than checking out a bunch of books on the subject. They are sitting comfortably, and unopened, on my desk. That counts as starting right?
It's snowing up here. I really dislike snow. I like snow when I'm safely inside with hot chocolate - which is how I plan on spending my afternoon in the Medieval Library.
A girl just fell off her chair and we all pretended it didn't happen. The lecture is about to start.
So Bye.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Chinese dumpling tutorial
Today my procrastination capacity has reached a new level of originality and imagination. But that's okay because I finished my history essay yesterday! So I feel accomplished and am now sitting in the break room in the library eating snickerdoodles with my textbooks splayed around me so it looks like I'm studying but instead writing this post and using my computer device to do things that are really important to me like watching a tutorial on how to make Chinese dumplings. But I'm happy sitting here not doing anything productive because I've been really stressed this week with the insane amount of reading that my professors assigned (like actually virtually impossible) because they worship satan and dine on sickly farm animals for recreation. Oh p.s. the majority of my diet for the past 3 days has been cookies (these amazing snickerdoodles that my mother sent me in the mail) along with butterfingers dipped in peanut butter. SO that might explain my energy level as well as my difficulty concentrating.
I've been watching Parks and Recreation and it is so funny, I had never seen it before. My favorite character is definitely April because she's everything I hope to be in a person and also cause Aubrey Plaza is a baaaabe. I really want to start eating better because that was one of my new year's resolutions but it's really hard when you're in line at the cafeteria and you're like, "O wut these Doritos are only a dollar what a find GOTTA TAKE ADVANTAGE. Because of the economy...taxes...Doritos." So on Friday night I was watching Parks and Rec in my room (like a champion) and Sam texts me at like 1:30 in the morn and is like, "I went to Sonic and got way too many chicken strips do you want them." And of course, being the warm-hearted sister that I am, I had to help him out. So that was gross, I ate like five of them and they are quite large. Anyway. Whatever. I'll start eating better after Spring Break...I know this is probably really fascinating reading about my dietary habits you're welcome.
Another one of my post-new year's resolutions is to not be so nice to people. This sounds like a terrible goal but it seems like a good idea to me because I have realized that when I'm in an uncomfortable situation with someone who is a jerk, I try to just be really super polite so that they stop acting like an asshole but a) that rarely works and b) those people don't deserve politeness. So I figure, if I'm less polite then those people won't be as bad to talk to. We'll see. My muses for this idea are Courtney Love Aubrey Plaza and Barbara Walters, despite the fact that I kind of despise her.
That's all I have to report for the time being, other than the obvious which is that I love and miss you all very much. Hailey I will be calling you tomorrow for your birthday!!!
Goodbye.
Love Elaina
I've been watching Parks and Recreation and it is so funny, I had never seen it before. My favorite character is definitely April because she's everything I hope to be in a person and also cause Aubrey Plaza is a baaaabe. I really want to start eating better because that was one of my new year's resolutions but it's really hard when you're in line at the cafeteria and you're like, "O wut these Doritos are only a dollar what a find GOTTA TAKE ADVANTAGE. Because of the economy...taxes...Doritos." So on Friday night I was watching Parks and Rec in my room (like a champion) and Sam texts me at like 1:30 in the morn and is like, "I went to Sonic and got way too many chicken strips do you want them." And of course, being the warm-hearted sister that I am, I had to help him out. So that was gross, I ate like five of them and they are quite large. Anyway. Whatever. I'll start eating better after Spring Break...I know this is probably really fascinating reading about my dietary habits you're welcome.
Another one of my post-new year's resolutions is to not be so nice to people. This sounds like a terrible goal but it seems like a good idea to me because I have realized that when I'm in an uncomfortable situation with someone who is a jerk, I try to just be really super polite so that they stop acting like an asshole but a) that rarely works and b) those people don't deserve politeness. So I figure, if I'm less polite then those people won't be as bad to talk to. We'll see. My muses for this idea are Courtney Love Aubrey Plaza and Barbara Walters, despite the fact that I kind of despise her.
That's all I have to report for the time being, other than the obvious which is that I love and miss you all very much. Hailey I will be calling you tomorrow for your birthday!!!
Goodbye.
Love Elaina
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Rambly post #4
So I decided that to continue our streak I should also post a long rambly message about my life and then apologize for the ramplyness of it. But I don't think I really have anything to ramble about. I mean my body is pretty worn out from ya know... so much SEX. lawl no. its from basketball. I'm real tired and seem to have a new sore spot every day so that kinda sucks. Plus I never sleep enough. Tonight I think I'm actually going to get almost 9 hours of sleep though depending on how long this post takes for me to write and what I decide to write about.... cause I still don't know. This weekend (sunday night only actually) kinda sucked cause I stayed up til 4:30 writing two essays then fell asleep then woke up at 5:30 and wrote til 6:30 then slept til 8 and finished and edited them to be done by 10 on monday... so that blew. but luckily now the rest of this week has been super light and easy on the homework so I've been able to just sort of lounge around and relax. I still need to catch up on sleep.
I feel like I need to think more about my birthday. Everyone keeps asking me what I want to do and what I want and stuff and I have no idea and haven't really thought about it much. I am sooooooo happy because this week since we had a game tuesday night we only have one on friday and since we'll have had 4 games in 8 days we get Saturday and Sunday off so I'm bouts to break some rules of dry season (don't worry everyone pretty much on my team who drinks will they like to party) and drink some and actually go out and shturf so that should be fun. I want to go to breakfast or dinner or something with friends one of the days and do something crazy and fun. I want to look good. I want to be with my friends. I want to make something. It should be a fun weekend but we'll see what happens. I'll let you know!! (slashhhh I got myself an early birthday present-- my first thing of lingerie that I might whip out hehe)
Other newly important events coming up in my life that I'm missing out of because of basketball is valentines day... and I know its not that important but its still fun because I've never had a valentine before and i think it would be fun. But we have to leave right after practice thursday at like 6:30 and practice starts at 4 so we have class all day at different times so I'm just kinda screwed for that holiday... all well. I should still get him something and I have NO IDEA.... what do you get someone for valentines day who you've only been dating a little over four months... I could just make him delicious snacks on snacks on snacks... thats always an idea. I don't know but if you have ideas let me know please =]
Kelsey has this guy on our floor who's totallllllllyyyyy into her. Fiona met him. His name is James. Her and Clayton kinda fizzled out but yeah. She says she only has a baby crush on James but he really likes her I think. and they have been constantly together these last two weeks and there is so much flirtation going on I could barf. (speaking of... did you hear that story? Kelsey hooked up with clayton a couple weeks ago- she was semi-intoxicated... but after words she threw up allllllll over his floor and then passed out- maybe a little more than semi? hehe I think thats kinda funny and now everyone including him makes fun of her and calls her Kelsey BLEHHG) so I think that would be cool if her and James got together. I had never really thought about it but they look really good together- not awkward like clayton and her-- and I think it would work a lot better. But she's still not sure and I think thats good that she doesn't rush it and kinda figure it out on her own instead of having other people do it for her. I'll keep you updated on that too. Well I must be off to bed! Goodnight lovelies. I love you all loves. You are all spectacular and I want to see your faces and touch them with mine. yeah. kbye
p.s. sorry for the ramblyness of this post =] love you.
I feel like I need to think more about my birthday. Everyone keeps asking me what I want to do and what I want and stuff and I have no idea and haven't really thought about it much. I am sooooooo happy because this week since we had a game tuesday night we only have one on friday and since we'll have had 4 games in 8 days we get Saturday and Sunday off so I'm bouts to break some rules of dry season (don't worry everyone pretty much on my team who drinks will they like to party) and drink some and actually go out and shturf so that should be fun. I want to go to breakfast or dinner or something with friends one of the days and do something crazy and fun. I want to look good. I want to be with my friends. I want to make something. It should be a fun weekend but we'll see what happens. I'll let you know!! (slashhhh I got myself an early birthday present-- my first thing of lingerie that I might whip out hehe)
Other newly important events coming up in my life that I'm missing out of because of basketball is valentines day... and I know its not that important but its still fun because I've never had a valentine before and i think it would be fun. But we have to leave right after practice thursday at like 6:30 and practice starts at 4 so we have class all day at different times so I'm just kinda screwed for that holiday... all well. I should still get him something and I have NO IDEA.... what do you get someone for valentines day who you've only been dating a little over four months... I could just make him delicious snacks on snacks on snacks... thats always an idea. I don't know but if you have ideas let me know please =]
Kelsey has this guy on our floor who's totallllllllyyyyy into her. Fiona met him. His name is James. Her and Clayton kinda fizzled out but yeah. She says she only has a baby crush on James but he really likes her I think. and they have been constantly together these last two weeks and there is so much flirtation going on I could barf. (speaking of... did you hear that story? Kelsey hooked up with clayton a couple weeks ago- she was semi-intoxicated... but after words she threw up allllllll over his floor and then passed out- maybe a little more than semi? hehe I think thats kinda funny and now everyone including him makes fun of her and calls her Kelsey BLEHHG) so I think that would be cool if her and James got together. I had never really thought about it but they look really good together- not awkward like clayton and her-- and I think it would work a lot better. But she's still not sure and I think thats good that she doesn't rush it and kinda figure it out on her own instead of having other people do it for her. I'll keep you updated on that too. Well I must be off to bed! Goodnight lovelies. I love you all loves. You are all spectacular and I want to see your faces and touch them with mine. yeah. kbye
p.s. sorry for the ramblyness of this post =] love you.
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
hi.
My dearest darlings,
First of all, Sophia, you always make me cry with your descriptions of fantasy shenanigans and such. That was beautiful.
Secondly, Hailey your post made me really happy. We're a good lookin' bunch, eh?
And thirdly, Elaina, I love your brain.
I feel as though I haven't conversed with you in so long. I've been wanting to call or message but so much has been going on and I feel like my brain is so crowded that I don't even have the energy most times to sit down and try to sort though all of these thoughts. WHEW. That all sounds like I'm going through a mental breakdown or something (well, actually this past weekend I sort of did - i will explain) but NOW I'm actually pretty fine. I mean, i'm mostly happy. Hah...I guess I won't commit to saying I'm totally happy though. See, before this past weekend I had been in quite a funk. I was feeling really really unmotivated and depressed and my lil' ol' self-esteem was just really hitting a low point...it was a combination of many factors, including my stress about school and not having a job since I'm not with Muse and my parents haven't been getting along lately and blah blah so on and so forth. I was just going down in this spiral of self-deprecation and inertia (ooooh the agonyyy) (gawd) (also ~word choice props~) and all this tension in my family just kept building and building until it blew up this weekend, when, long story short, my parents and I had a huge fight on friday night and then on saturday morning they sat me down and said I had to find a job in a month or else I'd have to find another place to live (you're probably thinking, like I did, whhhoa harsh, but later they took that back and said they wouldn't actually kick me out so it's cool) and so now I'm on the hunt for a crap job! woooo. and i'm still working on my application for sou. I've been really procrastinating that. I just have the personal essay part left. I don't really know why, but its been really hard to think about what I would write about, and since my self-esteem has been so low I haven't really wanted to think about myself at all. BUT no more avoiding. I think I definitely needed for everything to blow up and to just cry and cry and for someone to just shake me out of this funk. So I feel clearer now. And much happier. Just more stressed - but good stress.
I think the ablaze rehearsals have definitely helped give me some direction and motivation. I'm really enjoying it. I was afraid in the beginning that I wouldn't like any of the people, because they reeeally overwhelmed me at first with their gregarious outgoing personalities and random outbursts of every song from every musical ever. And that hasn't really ceased, but i've gotten used to it. And man, it's hard work. But it's still fun.
so. sorry for that long and winding rant...
I'm just going to say things more often, so then they don't become long and winding!
Anyways, love love love,
Fi
Monday, February 4, 2013
how i f33l 2day
I've had to check my phone like three times today to remind myself what day of the week it is. For some reason it really feels like a Tuesday. Which is strange because I often find that it "feels" like a Monday or it "feels" like a Friday but when does it ever "feel" like a Tuesday? Anyway. Today, whatever day it is, has been both good and bad. It's been good in that over the past few days I've been trying to stop feeling sorry for myself for being so sad for no particular reason all the time, and start initiating conversations more and stop being so quiet and reserved about my interests. Because I've recently discovered that I do actually like talking to people who I don't know, it's just the fear of them rejecting me that makes me so quiet around people. So (getting to the point now) that's how it's been a good day, because I've been talking to people in my classes and trying to branch out from my small group of friends that I don't even really even enjoy being around. (Okay except Nicole.) Also I've discovered that I really like life. (I know that sounded so cheesy) but--especially since I started going here--I've really resented life and often wished I had someone else's life, but what I've realized is that I do love life I just hate living HERE. So if that means moving somewhere else then I'm going to do that because I feel like I haven't done anything wrong and I should be happy like anyone else. This probably seems like it is coming out of nowhere, so sorry if this reads as really random and/or dramatic, I just needed to vent somewhere other than my journal.
So there's that, but then it's also been a bad day because of little trivial things that I probably hyperbolize far more than necessary. Like, for instance, in my Humanities class today my professor asked me a question and I didn't know how to answer it and I could just feel everyone's eyes on me and could feel my face getting all hot and I probably looked like a tomato. Which isn't a big deal, I know, everyone gets flustered in class, but it was still embarrassing. And then the second bad thing about today was another silly triviality. So right after that class I went to Oppenheimer to get a coffee and relax for a bit before I started my homework, and I always go to Oppenheimer when I don't want to see anyone I know because it's located in this glass dome type thing in the center of the math and science buildings and it's mostly always upper-classmen science dudes in there. But today, as I was waiting for my drink, I saw Mark and a bunch of his friends and they were standing right next to me, also waiting for their drinks, and I just felt so anxious to get out of there because I was still sort of flustered from class and I was just feeling off and my hair was dirty and as I was standing there I was eating one of those mini Tillamook cheese rectangle things and one of Mark's friends was like, "Are you just eating plain cheese by itself?" And I just wanted to DIE because they were all waiting for me to say something and instead I just sort of laughed really awkwardly and grabbed my drink and left and oh god it was so awful. Right now I'm in the library in one of the little private study rooms which I love, and I should be doing homework cause I have an essay due on Wednesday but whatever. Tonight I'm going to yoga with this girl Chloe from the radio and thennnnn I think I will take a shower and finish my homework and sleep. I hardly slept at all last night which might be why today has felt so weird. It's also why this post probably sounds ranty and babbly. But then again what would this lil blog be if it wasn't filled with ranting and babbling? Mkay. It's 5:50 and my eyelids are already fluttering closed from exhaustion. Better go. farewell. so long. sleep well. kisses. hugs. hand-holding. foot-fondling? bye now.
Love you all to (tiny chopped up marinated) pieces,
Elaina
So there's that, but then it's also been a bad day because of little trivial things that I probably hyperbolize far more than necessary. Like, for instance, in my Humanities class today my professor asked me a question and I didn't know how to answer it and I could just feel everyone's eyes on me and could feel my face getting all hot and I probably looked like a tomato. Which isn't a big deal, I know, everyone gets flustered in class, but it was still embarrassing. And then the second bad thing about today was another silly triviality. So right after that class I went to Oppenheimer to get a coffee and relax for a bit before I started my homework, and I always go to Oppenheimer when I don't want to see anyone I know because it's located in this glass dome type thing in the center of the math and science buildings and it's mostly always upper-classmen science dudes in there. But today, as I was waiting for my drink, I saw Mark and a bunch of his friends and they were standing right next to me, also waiting for their drinks, and I just felt so anxious to get out of there because I was still sort of flustered from class and I was just feeling off and my hair was dirty and as I was standing there I was eating one of those mini Tillamook cheese rectangle things and one of Mark's friends was like, "Are you just eating plain cheese by itself?" And I just wanted to DIE because they were all waiting for me to say something and instead I just sort of laughed really awkwardly and grabbed my drink and left and oh god it was so awful. Right now I'm in the library in one of the little private study rooms which I love, and I should be doing homework cause I have an essay due on Wednesday but whatever. Tonight I'm going to yoga with this girl Chloe from the radio and thennnnn I think I will take a shower and finish my homework and sleep. I hardly slept at all last night which might be why today has felt so weird. It's also why this post probably sounds ranty and babbly. But then again what would this lil blog be if it wasn't filled with ranting and babbling? Mkay. It's 5:50 and my eyelids are already fluttering closed from exhaustion. Better go. farewell. so long. sleep well. kisses. hugs. hand-holding. foot-fondling? bye now.
Love you all to (tiny chopped up marinated) pieces,
Elaina
Friday, February 1, 2013
And so begins another semester
It is a truth universally acknowledged that a university student planning on living outside of a cardboard box is in want of a house. Unfortunately for me and my friends house hunting is akin to the Hunger Games - except with more blood. We began this week all bright eyed and rosy cheeked to go see a house on Queen's Terrace. It was lovely, stone, with huge windows to beautiful views, and big wide bedrooms and sitting room and swirly staircases. We loved it, and ran from the viewing to the agency only to find a girl sitting in front of Jude (the agent guy - his real name is Derek I just call him Jude) claiming the house we had just seen. It was really soul ripping and with heavy hearts we proceeded to the nearest cafe to buy ourselves pity tea and then purge in the only toy shop in Saint Andrews. That actually worked to lift my mood. We have since then hit the ground running in searching for a house but have yet to find anything below the price of a small country. This town is ridiculously expensive and filled with rich people (or rich parented people) who feel no need to question it. Oh well. I've limited my pub outings to once a week (except when Paul is buying) and all outings have to be free. I went to the castle again the other day with my gown so as to enter for free and just read on one of the benches, wrapped up in my big red gown for warmth.
I've been experimenting more on my runs as well. Today I left around four, just before the sun thinks about setting, and headed off in a random direction. I turned into Lady Brae's Walk (I pronounce it Lady Bra Walk but I'm fairly positive of the inaccuracy of my assessment) and took a winding path that led me to a deserted park. The path dipped down to follow a river in a thin forest before ascending back up into housing. Quite sure I was lost but in no real hurry, I jogged along the road of houses before unexpectedly being deposited in the center of town. I took up along South Street and swung around to the cathedral where I followed the graveyard to the harbor where I sat on the edge of the long stone pier at high tide - occasionally getting misted by the angry salty ocean and singing at the top of my lungs. I then continued along the ocean as the sunset painted the sky a pink and baby blue, the clouds a careless painters dash on the canvas. When I got back my roommate was still at lecture, so I showered, put on my softest sweater, and curled up with my next English novel on my windowsill and watched the last traces of the sun disappear, listening to the North and South song.
This semester looks as though the classes will be good. I'm taking Medieval History, Art History, and English. I'm really starting to get into medieval. As long as they stay far away from Arthurian times I'll be just fine. I like the puzzle of history. I like the storytelling. Art history is proving better than the first semester as well, considering that it isn't a repetitious religious maze (My memorization last year consisted of trying to discern which artist matched up with the dozens of Adoration of the Magi's, Presentation of Christ at Temples, Madonna and Child's and endless, endless altar pieces. Now that we're getting out of the Renaissance I might be able to pay more attention in lectures. English is also good (of course). I needed a class this semester that would just allow me to read things fictional.
We began with Oroonoko - which is about a Slave Prince who falls in love, is captured after his ladylove is sold, finds his lady, gets whipped, kills his lady so that she is kept pure and away from his enemies, and then is dismembered. CHARMING. The best part is actually right after he murders his lover and they find him cause they smelled the dead body and were like "Dude. Why did you kill her man?" and he was like "DON EVEN MESS WITH ME RIGHT MEOW" and he proceeds to cut off a chunk of his own throat and throws it at them. Then cuts open his belly and throws his guts at them. They knock him out, then stitch him up, so that they can cut off his body bit by bit. For his credit, the whole time he's just smoking his goddamn pipe. Genitals? Smokin the pipe. Legs? Pipe. Arm? Uses other hand for pipe. Other hand? Pipe. Then finally his torso is cut into fours. Just... so cheery. Naturally I had to supplement this reading with my Scottish romance novel (The Outlander).
Well that's me. Sorry if this sounds a bit ramble-y and journal entry-y. I haven't written in my journal for ages so this will count as one. I miss you all terribly. I know we say that all the time but I mean it. I am also craving the sun (never thought I would but I do). I like the smell of my new soap.
I wear the headband that Hailey made me almost everyday. I watch the kissing scene of North and South daily and I remember Elaina and Fiona and me squealing in agonized joy over the barely touching hero and heroine at one in the morning. I reread your letters before I go to sleep. I want to giggle ridiculously over the kilt-clad men here with Hailey, sit on my bed and just talk. I love talking with you. You always say the right thing and know when to listen and when to laugh. I want to listen to music and read by the river on Lady Brae's Walk with Elaina with poetry books that we actually manage to read this time. I love hearing you read poetry. You have perfect timing and voice and I think the poet would appreciate someone who knows what they were trying to say and how they wanted to say it. I want to wake up early and go to that coffee shop on North Street with Fiona, get coffee and walk to the beach and walk along the West Sands -- all 2 miles of it -- and talk some of the way, and just be silent for the rest. I love how I can do that with you - how silences are okay and comfortable and full of small smiles and deep, lung filling breaths.
But more than all of that I want us to be together - like we belong. Like we haven't been in too long. We're all so different that when we are together we balance each other out and fit. I want to show you all Scotland. Or at least Scotland as I see it. I want us all to go to Ceilidhs and exchange ecstatic glances as we twirl around with men in kilts, tilting our heads back and laughing - faces beat red and completely out of breath from bouncing and spinning and clapping to the fiddle and song. I want us all to go to the castle, and then the cathedral and try to find the oldest gravestone, creating stories for the long dead people that have already turned to dust underneath us. I want us all to walk on the beach, and look for starfish in the tide pools. I want us to hold hands and jump off the pier into the ocean, shrieking and freezing our asses off. I just want you guys to be here. I want to share Scotland with you. I've fallen in love with it. Us all being here would be like the Traveling Pants sisterhood when they all go try to find the pants in Greece -- they were the pantless sisterhood then I guess, too huh?
With all of my heart
Sophia
I've been experimenting more on my runs as well. Today I left around four, just before the sun thinks about setting, and headed off in a random direction. I turned into Lady Brae's Walk (I pronounce it Lady Bra Walk but I'm fairly positive of the inaccuracy of my assessment) and took a winding path that led me to a deserted park. The path dipped down to follow a river in a thin forest before ascending back up into housing. Quite sure I was lost but in no real hurry, I jogged along the road of houses before unexpectedly being deposited in the center of town. I took up along South Street and swung around to the cathedral where I followed the graveyard to the harbor where I sat on the edge of the long stone pier at high tide - occasionally getting misted by the angry salty ocean and singing at the top of my lungs. I then continued along the ocean as the sunset painted the sky a pink and baby blue, the clouds a careless painters dash on the canvas. When I got back my roommate was still at lecture, so I showered, put on my softest sweater, and curled up with my next English novel on my windowsill and watched the last traces of the sun disappear, listening to the North and South song.
This semester looks as though the classes will be good. I'm taking Medieval History, Art History, and English. I'm really starting to get into medieval. As long as they stay far away from Arthurian times I'll be just fine. I like the puzzle of history. I like the storytelling. Art history is proving better than the first semester as well, considering that it isn't a repetitious religious maze (My memorization last year consisted of trying to discern which artist matched up with the dozens of Adoration of the Magi's, Presentation of Christ at Temples, Madonna and Child's and endless, endless altar pieces. Now that we're getting out of the Renaissance I might be able to pay more attention in lectures. English is also good (of course). I needed a class this semester that would just allow me to read things fictional.
We began with Oroonoko - which is about a Slave Prince who falls in love, is captured after his ladylove is sold, finds his lady, gets whipped, kills his lady so that she is kept pure and away from his enemies, and then is dismembered. CHARMING. The best part is actually right after he murders his lover and they find him cause they smelled the dead body and were like "Dude. Why did you kill her man?" and he was like "DON EVEN MESS WITH ME RIGHT MEOW" and he proceeds to cut off a chunk of his own throat and throws it at them. Then cuts open his belly and throws his guts at them. They knock him out, then stitch him up, so that they can cut off his body bit by bit. For his credit, the whole time he's just smoking his goddamn pipe. Genitals? Smokin the pipe. Legs? Pipe. Arm? Uses other hand for pipe. Other hand? Pipe. Then finally his torso is cut into fours. Just... so cheery. Naturally I had to supplement this reading with my Scottish romance novel (The Outlander).
Well that's me. Sorry if this sounds a bit ramble-y and journal entry-y. I haven't written in my journal for ages so this will count as one. I miss you all terribly. I know we say that all the time but I mean it. I am also craving the sun (never thought I would but I do). I like the smell of my new soap.
I wear the headband that Hailey made me almost everyday. I watch the kissing scene of North and South daily and I remember Elaina and Fiona and me squealing in agonized joy over the barely touching hero and heroine at one in the morning. I reread your letters before I go to sleep. I want to giggle ridiculously over the kilt-clad men here with Hailey, sit on my bed and just talk. I love talking with you. You always say the right thing and know when to listen and when to laugh. I want to listen to music and read by the river on Lady Brae's Walk with Elaina with poetry books that we actually manage to read this time. I love hearing you read poetry. You have perfect timing and voice and I think the poet would appreciate someone who knows what they were trying to say and how they wanted to say it. I want to wake up early and go to that coffee shop on North Street with Fiona, get coffee and walk to the beach and walk along the West Sands -- all 2 miles of it -- and talk some of the way, and just be silent for the rest. I love how I can do that with you - how silences are okay and comfortable and full of small smiles and deep, lung filling breaths.
But more than all of that I want us to be together - like we belong. Like we haven't been in too long. We're all so different that when we are together we balance each other out and fit. I want to show you all Scotland. Or at least Scotland as I see it. I want us all to go to Ceilidhs and exchange ecstatic glances as we twirl around with men in kilts, tilting our heads back and laughing - faces beat red and completely out of breath from bouncing and spinning and clapping to the fiddle and song. I want us all to go to the castle, and then the cathedral and try to find the oldest gravestone, creating stories for the long dead people that have already turned to dust underneath us. I want us all to walk on the beach, and look for starfish in the tide pools. I want us to hold hands and jump off the pier into the ocean, shrieking and freezing our asses off. I just want you guys to be here. I want to share Scotland with you. I've fallen in love with it. Us all being here would be like the Traveling Pants sisterhood when they all go try to find the pants in Greece -- they were the pantless sisterhood then I guess, too huh?
With all of my heart
Sophia
Thursday, January 31, 2013
oh hey.....
this should be used more. Sophia I miss you I feel like I haven't really talked to you in a long time. We should rant and post pictures and videos and silly things and be forever together. I love you all so much
i love you forever i love you for always as long as I'm living my best friends you'll be
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